Thank You Lord! She no longer has to be in pain, she no longer has to wear a mask of strength in her weakest moments, she is totally at rest and now I know that is exactly what I asked God for. I am so thankful she no longer suffers but she has peace. Now that I am in a place where I can hear God, He told me “that night when you kept asking why, I was trying to tell you I heard you and that I gave her exactly what you asked.” Although I am left with the pain, the hurt, the sadness of losing my mom. So In that moment I didn't realize God had answered my prayers, I was so wrapped in my own selﬁshness that I didn't see it. God’s peace surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7). He gave my mom the peace I had been praying for.

He took away all the sickness, all the pain and replaced it with peace. I continued to pray for healing and peace for her and on Novemat 11:33 PM God answered those prayers. On NovemI made a Facebook post asking for prayers for my mom. I went from wishing I could keep a sick mom to being grateful to God for giving her peace. A piece of my heart forever broken, but changed. Her skin was still so soft and it's a feeling I will never forget.įast forward 6 years later. I just held her hand, I kept holding her hand until they got there to get the body. How selﬁsh of me? Eventually the tears ceased for a minute and I silently sat and as I held my mom’s hand. Shamefully I admit, I even silently asked God to leave her here sick if that meant I could hold on to her longer. 'Why God, Why God, Why? I asked Him over and over and over, but in that moment I wasn't ready to hear God's answer. What am I supposed to do with this, I continued to ask God that question. My mom, who was so full of life, so out going, so full of faith took her last breath and I heard it. I yelled, I screamed, I cried uncontrollably. I couldn't believe it, I didn’t want to believe it. My grandma and I looked at each other hoping one of us would say that it didn’t just happen. She continued to gasp and ﬁnally took her last breath. I immediately ran in the room where her and my maw maw were.

I heard my dear mom who had been in a semi comatose state gasping for air. Everything had changed, even the air felt different. Although she wasn’t moving I saw her chest motioning up and down. She was lying there still as she had been all week, so I figured everything was ok. I popped my head in on my mama as I always do. Once I was out of the shower I headed right back to the living room sofa to resume the work. I was doing some work for my husband then decided to go and take a shower. I remember the night almost exactly as it happened. This ball of emotion I have been all week is because this very week 6 years ago I listened as my mom took her last breath.

Brandy have you ever loved somebody